'We don't practice these kinds of conversations ... You can listen'
By JAMES BELL
Hays Post
Middle school can be a difficult time under the best of circumstances, but when mental health concerns are left unaddressed, it can create lifelong negative impacts.
In an effort to improve the mental health of middle school students, Leadership Hays 2022 created Green Ribbon Hays. The event features a free hour-long community discussion that will provide resources, increase awareness and inspire hope at 6:30 p.m. Oct. 11 in the Dreiling Theater at Thomas More Prep-Marian High School, 1701 Hall.
During the event, participants will be led by area pastor and motivational speaker Patrick McGinnis, who will share lessons on empathy, understanding and finding connection in others.
McGinnis said a primary goal of the event is finding ways to “cross the bridge” to meaningful conversations.
“Whether you're talking to a sixth grader, seventh or eighth grader, or whether you're talking to each other, we know that mental health and its impact is all around us all the time,” he said. “And we just struggle with how do we actually talk about it.
“That night will be me strategizing with people, empowering people on how you can start conversations, and then maybe a few tools to help them along the way,” he continued. “But mostly, it'll be about how do you create a space where you can actually have a meaningful conversation with people. And so, when they're hurting, or when they're struggling, or when they become aware of when they need the support. Then also giving them a space where they can share and, and some basic active listening skills.”
McGinnis said the goal is empowering people to find within themselves the ability to make a difference in terms of mental health.
“The answer to helping our kids and helping each other is having those conversations,” he said. “If we can share in people's lives a little bit better, and then learn a few skills on how to do that so that we're not so scared of it, then the community as a whole can make an impact. We, as individuals, can make an impact, and we open up our ears and our eyes. People need to be seen whether you're in seventh grade or whether you're 50. People need to be heard.”
McGinnis said that finding that ability and creating trust in the conversations is especially important for children.
“I don't know that I could say it strongly enough,” he said. “Those are formative years; they always have been formative years. Most of us have had our experiences that those ages are highly emotional, tough years — or can be very tough years. And knowing where you fit and knowing that you have a voice has always been the case there.”
And with a heavy reliance on distance communication in the modern world, McGinnis said teaching youth about the importance of those conversations is more important than ever.
The community event is free and open to the public, but a second event is planned from 8 to 11 a.m. Oct. 12 at Hays Middle School, with only sixth through eighth students from Hays schools in attendance.
“The student sessions will follow the same theme of mental wellness through empathy, understanding, and connection,” according to the event announcement.
“My whole goal in what we do on that day is to let kids know that they have the ability to make a difference in other kids lives just like we do,” McGinnis said. “And empower them with some of those same skills.”
Green Ribbon Hays was an idea formed through Leadership Hays 2022, organized and supported by the Hays Chamber.
About 16 to 20 people to go through the course each year to learn how to motivate people to support their community, said Kyle Carlin, a member of the latest class. The session includes training with the Kansas Leadership Center in Wichita on what it takes to have an impact on your community.
“Through this process, or through the Leadership Hays project, one of the end results for each class is to develop a project that will have a lasting impact on the community, especially for impacting youth,” Carlin said. “For our class, we were talking through some different ideas for what our project was going to be.”
Ultimately, he said the group saw an opportunity to support middle school-aged students.
“So, we turned our focus towards the mental health of those students,” Carlin said. “And so, came up with this idea for presentations that will help the students, but then also help the community and other the parents in the community have these conversations to support this age range.”
Creating the event was also thanks to the support of several area organizations.
“The 2022 Class of Leadership Hays has worked closely with FHSU NAMI on Campus, FHSU Psychology Club, Ken Windholz, Patrick McGinnis, administrators of Hays Middle School, TMP-Marian and Holy Family Elementary, and the Hays Chamber of Commerce,” according to the event announcement.
McGinnis said he hopes students and parents can take advantage of the sessions to learn how to be more connected to others in the community.
“I would encourage anybody to be there,” he said. “Because the thing is … we don't practice these kinds of conversations, whether at work or anything else. We don't necessarily discuss this stuff.”
Learning how to communicate those emotions, thoughts and feelings better can then be used in other conversations.
“This can happen in the school, this can happen with your counselor, this can happen with a teacher. But this can also happen in the lunchroom between two students,” McGinnis said. “You can be aware of those that are hurting, and then carve out time and space, to have that kind of conversation, help people be seen, help them be heard, help them to be to know they're connected because that's a core need in all of us. We need to know that people understand this. And we can do that. I mean, literally, you can help people do that with a five-minute conversation. You can listen.”